An ego that wants something from another-will usually play some kind of role to get its needs met. Some kind of gratification, be it physical or psychological. I would say people are usually completely aware of the roles they play. I can definitely speak for myself. We strive off of attention but the catch here is why do we do this? The source of all the energy we need is within us (God is within us), yet we go searching for it through our egos.
This attention is some form of recognition, praise, admiration or just to be noticed in some way.
Adults are like children. If they can't get attention, they behave in a negative way (been there-done that) It is like crying out in an action that says, "please tell me i still exist." This is an extreme version of a normal ego. Then there is the one of a victim. This ego seeks sympathy or pity (in some form) It is all about "me and my story." This person tends to be a complainer and never happy. She/He hangs onto their past. Be it yesterday or 10 years ago. They feel there is no life without that "story." Of course once you identify yourself with a story, you don't want it to end so you carry that story on and on. The ego does not want an end to its "problems" because it is apart of its identity. If no one listens to "the sad story" you just tell it to yourself in your head. You make yourself into someone that matters and that is all that matters to the "ego."
In the early stages of relationships, most people "role play" It is quite common in order to attract and keep the opposite person interested. During these stages we tend to think "I'll play who you want me to be and you'll play who i want you to be." That's the unspoken agreement (lol) However role playing is very hard work and these "faces" can't be sustained forever. When you start living together and these roles slip, what do you see? Unfortunately you will see the true essence of that person start to unfold. Layer by layer.
What we call "falling in love" is in most cases an intensification of our ego wanting and needing. You become addicted to another person. This is so unhealthy. What you are addicted to is NOT the other person it is YOUR image of that person. TRUE LOVE contains no wanting whatsoever.
You were born into your role. It is the role that others assigned to you. It was who you were or thought you were. Many years ago things may have been different but in the modern world, more and more people are confused as to where they fit in, what their purpose is, and even who they are. Is this a bad thing? No!
I admire when people say, "I don't know who I am." Because the truth is, it is better to not know than to act like you know (the ego).
When you accept that you don't know, you enter into a state of peace and clarity that is closer to who you truly are than you could ever imagine.
I DON'T KNOW!